Lumpy Lipids in Limbo

The GI Jane bootcamp went a wee bit silent after almost all of its members succumbed to the voracious appetite for smackalicious food naturally ingrained in their gourmet worshipping willpower. About the only people observed as taking this exercise thing seriously are our urat dawai Kak Tenah*, and Ely* who are actively doing serious circuit training and power walks respectively, while the persons whose heads are often found bobbing in and out of the fridge for snacks and quick desserts in between, and their continous talk about food with romantic passion helped little in their pursuit to manage that extra jiggle in their gait. You know who you are.

Homefront, I have lost the 5 lbs I gained this past weeks by chatting my way through meal times(a lot of ppl helped me do this, thank you), munching on fruits while watching food tv(a little bit of imagination helped) and taking omega-3 and honey propolis drops. Taking Senna seeds every other day also helps clean out my system too. That lemon and honey juice must have helped suppress my cravings. I still daydream about losing 15 more before I go shopping for sheers again.Sigh.

I tried walking, and timed myself. Whew! I remember running 100m in 16 secs back when I was so much younger and so much more in love with exercise, now I can hardly make it across the zebra crossing in 10. I guess I do have something to worry about especially when climbing the neighbourhood overhead bridge halfway left me panting and clutching my chest, it was definitely a sign of protest from my muscles(what muscles?) after being rudely woken up from sedentary slumber.

I guess after I completely heal from that Humpty Dumpty had a great fall episode, I'd bring myself to the club and run the treadmill with the Ah Sohs and Tai-tais....say, Monday?

So how low can you go lah?

*find them at Sentraal Station

Ku Izinkan Kasih

The song you are listening to is copyright controlled by EMI Publishing (M) Sdn Bhd. It is written by Azlan Abu Hassan, released and recorded by Camelia. This version is a vocal guide that I recorded, part of my job as a vocal stylist/backup singer. Sometimes before recording a new song, an artiste has to learn and "feel" the song. It is from these tapes/cds that they have an idea how the song goes and figure out how they can put in their own personal style in their own recording. I know some just hentam keromo and copy the guides, but the good ones like Anuar Zain, Hazami just to name a few, create magic instead.

Cempedak Had A Great Fall

Twas a serene morning for a fresh start when I woke up . A cup of instant cereal later, I was still hungry so I cut the biggest pear I had in the fridge(70 cts sebijik, pencekik punya fruitseller). I thought that if I were to slowly grind this fruit between my chompers while watching food tv, I might forget about waffles and compote. Aishah did not want anything heavy for breakfast, so she agreed to have some cheese, crackers and some of my pear.

The journey(macam la jauh bebenor eh) to the TV room was easy. With Classic 95.0 piping a little cosy ambience, CA straightened up before bed last night so the hall looked magnificent with the school of 9 flourescent blue chromi dancing to the music.We completely ignored the mini Bukit Timah of laundry and made a pit stop infront of the newly resuscitated fish tank. The oldest occupant is, Mommy Nemo, the female maroon clownfish that looked a bit nervous being outnumbered by those tiny yet hyperactive blue squadron of chromis, so we gave her a little pep talk while she was fondled by the tiny tentackles of her round-the-clock masseuse, the neon anemone.

Oh did you know that clownfish are born sexless? How they perform later in life would determine whether they are either female or male.None of that d*ke or metrosexual confusion that we as humans sometimes have. Just before they reach akil baligh, or rather puberty, in other words be old enough to have some bedroom action, they will engage in battle with each other, and the winner shall henceforth be a female. From then on, the losers(sic) are to be toyboys or sex slaves to the respective female and father more and more fries. Now, I wonder who are the lucky ones here. So how can you tell the difference? The boss-lady would develop a darker color and would gradually lose some of her stripes. It is important to note that once the sex has been determined, it is irreversible. So if you are a clownfish fry reading this, better practise your martial arts and win your womanhood. Heheh.

Poor Mommy Nemo is a loner these days. I guess all the boys we gave her weren't good enough. They did not survive Mommy Nemo's kung fu hustling. So far we have had 3 anemones, the latest being the one she seems to enjoy most.

Sorry, I digress.

So while engaging in an animated exchange of deliberate baby gibberish and tummy jabs with Aishah, we finally got to the tv room. I didn't realize there was a puddle of aircond water( alaa..kena service la pulak) on the floor, slipped and lost my footing. I could not centralize myself in time to levitate(perasan lagi), and stumbled on the upright fan and fell on our minibar/box fridge and finally the whole of my 2*.7 BMI crashed on my left knee before I rolled on the floor, grimacing in pain. My TV breakfast went flying all over the place. A sudden surge of what felt like a mini electrocution shot up my spine and stopped somewhere in my ribcage. Placed myself in a recovery position and asked Aishah to get me my wireless from the cradle. It was difficult to decide whether to laugh of to cry, with Aishah giving me a looooooooooooooog and all of a sudden articulate lecture on being careful with all that "why" questions. I could not even speak to CA over the phone because of this little pot pet machine. After the usual first aid thing, minyak angin and stuff, I was mobile again, suffering only a limp and a dull pain in my lumbar area whenever I attempt to move.

As usual, I called the inlaws' for some manja, Bapak insisted that I should teach Aishah to speed-dial their number in case I get klutzy again. I was quickly summoned to Tampines. I took the bus, Zana. Terror tak? Had a quick Old Chang Kee and Jollibean picnic at the interchange. Called CA and asked if he'd like some of those ugly looking epok-epok? I didn't even have to ta pao because he told us he'd join us in our budaya lepak activity. Alang-alang menyeluk pekasam, biar sampai ke pangkal BANQUET- the halal food court. Aishah and I had a fruit platter while CA when slurp-a-slurping the hot-hot Yong Tao Foo.

After packing a bag of Butterfly Kueh, we headed towards the inlaws' for my couple of days of manja-ing marathon.

Pengumuman

Pasting this on behalf of a fellow puisi-relayist , Dzan who has initiated a Bahasa Melayu Bahasa Serantau projek. Please read the following:

WelCome to Project Cermin : Sejuta Puisi (suara pandu dan hidup serantau)
by cermin on August 2, 2005 11:10AM (MYT)
Project : Cermin – Sejuta Puisi (suara pandu dan hidup Serantau)
Salam Sejahtera,
Ini adalah surat terbuka untuk semua para pengkarya – yang mapan, mahu pun yang baru berjinak-jinak dengan dunia penulisan. Sama ada karya anda pernah atau belum pernah disiarkan dimana media cetak, anda dijemput bergabung dalam usaha ini. Yang penting anda punya kemahuan untuk menyumbang dalam usaha ini, langsung berpeluang mecetak karya anda.
Sebagaimana yang telah dimaklumkan dikesempatan yang lalu, saya bercita-cita untuk menghasil sebuah Antologi atau Himpunan Puisi bersama seorang sahabat yang merupakan Penulis dan juga Penerbit diMalaysia. Ini adalah usaha pemangkin (spring board) dalam menyemarakkan penghasilan puisi bermutu dirantau ini.
Anggaplah usaha ini sebagai USAHA BERSAMA. Jadi jangan malu-malu untuk bergabung atau bertegur tentang cacat celanya. Kita harus menghasilkan bahan yang terbaik.
Projek Cermin
Projek ini yang saya namakan Cermin - adalah sebagai judul asas siri buku-buku yang bakal diterbitkan. Walaupun ini usaha pertama, hendaknya bukan yang terakhir.
Justeru itu, usaha pertama ini saya (sepakat dengan Sdr Hasan dari Sejuta puisi) judulkan

Cermin – Sejuta Puisi (suara pandu dan hidup Serantau)
Ia akan diselengarakan bersama oleh:
a. Ramdzan Minhat (johor malaysia) selaku Penyelaras ramdzan_minhat@yahoo.com

b. Hasan Ashapani (batam Indonesia) selaku Penyunting hasanaspahani@yahoo.com
Ia bakal menjadi titik tolak untuk projek seterusnya. Di kesempatan yang pertaman ini, kita akan membukukan Kumpulan / Antologi Puisi serantau (Singapura, Indonesia dan Malaysia). Dan buku ini juga bakal memuatkan Panduan (Ringkas atau sebaliknya) dalam mengarang dan menghasilkan Puisi.

Keinginan ini terdorong sejak lama sebelum saya bergabung dengan egroup SEJUTA PUISI yg dikelolakan oleh Sdr. Hasan. Dan bila sudah bergabung, saya dapati reaksi sumbangan dari pembaca dan pengkarya di SEJUTA PUISI begitu memberangsangkan.

Adalah sia-sia jika hasil karya itu tidak dibukukan. Tambahan lagi ada banyak keinginan dari pembaca yang mahu berilmu menghasilkan puisi. Saya yakin, masih banyak karya-karya yang baik hanya tersimpan dan diselitkan dibawah bantal atau dicorong-corong BLOG. Kalaulah esok INTERNET terus mati, berkuburlah segala karya indah yg telah disumbangkan.
Matlamat Cermin

Menggalakkan penulis terus berkarya Kreatif dan Intelektual di media cetak
Memperkayakan dan memertabatkan Lingua Bahasa Serantau
Menyumbang and memangkinkan masyarakat untuk terus peka dengan kesusasteraan serantau dan tatacara yang sama tapi berbeza
Membentuk dan meyampaikan maksud sejagat yang jitu pada umum.
Menghasilkan bukan sekadar buku KREATIF, tapi juga buku ILMU untuk penyumbang dan pembaca.

Peraturan Untuk Projek Cermin :

Berbahasa Melayu / Indonesia
Terbuka kepada sesiapa saja - yg mapan mahu pun yg baru berjinak-jinak
Jangan mencarut (vulgar) atau menyalahi undang-undang.
Untuk projek ini, hanya untuk genre Puisi, Pantun, Prosa, Perumpamaan dan Bidalan yang Asli dan milik sendiri.
Karya disumbang mesti belum pernah di terbitkan di mana-mana media cetak di Malaysia, Singapura, Brunei, Indonesia atau dimana pun.
Kalau pernah diterbit di Internet, itu tidak mengapa.

Untuk maklumat lanjut sila klik disini.

Teman Terulung

Lagu yang berkumandang di laman sawang blog saya hari ini ditujukan khas buat sahabat-sahabat saya di sini, baik yang baru dikenali, yang dah pun bersaudara dengan saya dan juga yang baru dijejaki kasihnya.

Paling istimewa buat aunty-aunty, pokcik-mokcik semua, kakak-kakak tersayang, abang-abang terhormat, adik-adik yang dikasihi, anak-anak angkat, diangkat dan terangkat,sedara-mara, suku-sakat, handai -taulan segala segalan yang masing-masing melimpah ruah sifat pemurah kasih dan kejujuran malah berharga ihsannya kepada saya sekeluarga, berkongsi kegirangan dan kesedihan selama kita berkenalan dan bersaudara.

Padi bukit diharap huma tidak semerah

sekam rompong hangit terbakar lalu terbelah

Budi tuan tak terbalas dik tangan yang lemah

semoga dirahmati sekeliannya dan diberkati Allah

Pinjam ayat kakteh : "I rab u"

Gear Up Your Rock Kapak Get Up

The biggest and heaviest names in Rock and Metal are congregating here this weekend. Book your tickets now!

Blogger Bottoms Up

Evidently, my Bahasa Melayu is kopak and pecah when I just let go huh? So back to my equally wordy equally ungrammatical English for the benefit of fellow Bahasa Melayu pecah speakers in my cohort.

So the meeting that wasn't last night is compensated by a wonderful, wonderful make up date at Raffles City this afternoon. There was no pre-date jitters on my part because I have spoken to CK several times over the phone prior to the meeting, it feels like I have known her for years.

Che Anwar could not join us as he had to finetune his band in preparation for the big rock gerek gig next week. So I made my way to Suntec City with Aishah on the MRT. Please remember that I am hopeless when it comes to public transport, but this is good training lah! The trip from Compasspoint to Dhoby Ghaut was uneventful, but the amount of time I had to carry Aishah was enough to tire me out 20 minutes into the journey. You cannot expect anyone to offer you a seat even if you make the most kesian look in this day an age. While trying to balance a 15 kg girl on one hand and holding on the pole in there for balance, I managed to terpeleot(sprain) the big toe which had been hit by a pin from the plug of the iron before I left the house earlier. Ouch.

Anyway, we alighted at Dhoby Ghaut and took the NS towards City Hall. The train was packed like sardines and Aishah got a little nervous. I was secretly nervous also, you know as a result of recent turns of events. Alhamdulillah, apart from being squashed front and back while carrying Aishah, I did not get my toes stepped on or get seriously hurt from standing in a crowded MRT.

I got there 4-ish, and went up straightaway to the 3rd floor looking for this gourmet chocolate cafe named Leonida(spelling?) and called CK to help me get there. My sense of direction is... *rolling eyes to the back of sockets*

Out of no where came an elegantly dressed petite lady, complete with a very chi-chi pashmina wrap, after a short introductory handshake and a lil muah muah, I was escorted into this equally chi-chi cafe and was greeted by two lovely ladies Sheryl and Noreez. Wah, I tell you , I felt underdressed, smelly, sweaty and clammy compared to these fragrant fashionistas. Fair enough, while waiting for me to get there, they had had a makeover at the MAC counter. All I had was a harrowing journey, huddled in a pressure cooker with similarly harrassed-looking commuters. I hope they did not mind my lack of pizzazz in the fashion department. But then again, I am an eclectic moody dresser, so you know...

First thing first, my nasi dagang was there. I have been craving for it for months, kempunan Pok Ku's Nasi Dagang party actually and CK was kind enough to offer to cook it for me someday. And it's my lucky day today. Now I remember how our paths first crossed. Thanks to Pok Ku, I found a generous and oh-so-chatty friend in CK. I had to focus really hard on our conversation as I was stealing glances and fantasizing about the promise of a gourmet surprise in that tightly sealed paper bag. There were also little goodies baked by little Yasmin, CK's gorgeous little princess who had a baking class earlier. Aishah had sarsaparilla, chocolates, mini pizzas and cheesesticks, I shuddered at the thought of the consequential sugar shock. As usual, there were clumsy spills and smears everywhere, I could almost feel every cringe of the unmarried ladies. Wait till you have one of your own. Conveniently, there were several stores that sell kids' stuff, so I got Aishah a cool black t-shirt in place of her blue stained one. Chit punya chat, chat punya chit, in between speed-smsing and toddler emergencies, we got along just fine. CK's husband the "hun", short for "honey" of course, was a natural conversationalist. It was very easy to get comfy with this lovely couple. The both of them exude all that Pantai Timur serenity about them. Those other two, hmm...are deliciously delectably ready for the picking.Yum! How do people say it these days? Mencari Cinta? So, urm, sapa-sapa nak berkenalan, sila beratur kat sini.

I feel a bit paiseh because I came almost emptyhanded,whereas CK gave me another surprise gift in a small box. It's a purple brooch embellished with crystals that looked like amethysts. When I look at it, it sorta reminds me of CK. Simple elegance, in a small packet. I am now resolved to make up for my lack of imagination. I will definitely wish to see all of them again, especially little Yasmin with whom I did not have the chance to really chat. It would be wonderful if Aishah could expand her social circle even if it means taking the MRT all the way to Jurong. Funny should CK point out that Aishah looks a bit like a boy. Yasmin on the other hand is a picture perfect living doll, demurely dressed in a floral frock complete with pony tails and stuff. My girl on the other hand, wore shorts and t-shirt and was the one who could not sit still. Just when it seemed like they were beginning to warm up to each other, we had to part ways as CK and friends had a previous engagement following our short and sweet meetup.

I, on the other hand had to deal with an emergency of some sort, I really felt clammy that I needed a bath ASAP. Aishah sent us running to the baby room for a diaper change, not before announcing to the world she's got gems in her pants. Oh, the drama.

I managed to find the MRT station and headed towards Bedok where Che Anwar was jamming. He picked me up at the interchange and in the car were the vocalist of the band with his 3 kids. What a pleasant surprise. Aishah really loves company. I have offered to babysit those kids the next time the dads jam, just so that Aishah could have some playmates and perhaps the boys can jam with uninhibited passion; i.e. without the kids around. In two weeks time Kak Ayu will come and visit( read:help me mop my house) and surely Aishah would enjoy the company of this brainy future estonot as I have thus far. I am just hoping all that pandai-ness would rub off.

P.S.Noreez and Raudz, the answer is YES

Pelesering By The Bay

MIL tersayang

Amaran: Pencemaran Bahasa Melayu tahap tak sedar diri berikutnya.

Sebentar tadi, Pak Incik dan Mak Incik telah berpoya-poya bersama dengan anak dan mak mertua tersayang di anak tangga tepi bangunan durian gergasi yang diberi nama Esplanade bagi menyaksikan pesta terkinja-kinja anak-anak muda zaman dah takde mana nak pegi dah sebab semua kedai dah tutup. Kegiatan berpeleseran ini adalah kesinambungan dari budaya lepak yang berleluasa di mana mana pusat-pusat membeli belah sementelah jualan mega murah masih berlangsung.Memandangkan malam masih muda, pipit-pipit dan murai-murai ini masih belum mahu pulang lagi ke rumah burung berjenama HDB lalu melepaklah di sini.

Memandangkan kebanyakan jalan-jalan ditutup sementara raptai hari kebangsaan sedang berlangsung di kebanyakan lokasi umum, perjalanan Pak Incik, Mak Incik sekeluarga ke arah muara di mana Si Durian terjelepuk itu ada sedikit kemacetan. Kami hanya sampai disitu tepat pukul 10 sipi-sipi sebelum bermulanya permainan band gerek bernama Dancing Nancies, nama sempena lagu Dave Matthews. Gerek sebab members yang main la beb! Jadi tak lah di kira kerugian sepenuhnya. Suasana di situ semacam kenduri kawin saja gamaknya, sebab, mak oii, ramainya Melayu. Yang nampak macam baru balik kebret pun ada, baru balik mengaji pun ada. Termasuklah Mak Incik dan Pak Incik kamu nih....Walaupun kesemputan sebab terpaksa parkir dekat Marina Promenade akibat jalan Tok Raffles kamu tu tutup, dan berjalan kaki di pesisiran sampai la nun kat Esepelenade hapekebenda tu(Baca ni buat le intonasi opoh hang siket iye?) Cik Esah kita tu, apa lagi, nampak je permukaan luas terbentang, mula la dia mengelinjang ke hulu ke hilior macam tak pernah lepas kandang. Pueh le teman ngejornya, yop.

Ate sampai je kat situ, band baru nak main kan, wah rasa macam star la pulak, kita sampai baru deme buka spotlight apa kebende. Wah, Mak Incik kamu bukannya biasa sangat tengok konsert monsert orang muda-muda ni sejak dah tua ni kan. Terhenjut-henjut la jugak dengan cara tak sengaja tu. Nasib baik ingat mak mertua ada kat sebelah, kalau idak, eeeeeeeeiii...Pandai jugak Si Royhan dan kawan2 tu main eh. Cuma satu je nak komen, bebudak kat sini tengok konsert duduk..ontok yo. Nak tepuk pun macam tak makan sebulan. Kalau nak bandingkan penonton live AF jauh satay dari arang. Budak-budak sini berdisiplin agaknya, nak berseronok pun tak berani kot eh? Takut kena , fine. Bukankah Singapore ini sebuah FINE CITY?

Abih Mak Incik kamu ni kan bawak anak kecik, terpaksa la berdiri jauh-jauh, mana la tahu kuat bebenor speaker tu karang, Cik Esah kamu ni kena tympanic perforation kang cemana la pulak eh?

Abih tu kita yang duduk kat tangga tu takkan la tak bergambar ye dak? Susah betul nak synchro senyuman Cik Esah kita tu. Mak Incik kamu pulak payah nak senyum betul-betul pasal, mak oih panasnya la duduk tepi laut malam-malam buta ni.Berpeluh-peluh dibuatnya. Pandang-pandang keliling ramai jugak mak incik-mak incik macam kita bawak anak. Cari-cari jugak geng bloggers, CK yang patutnya kalau sempat nak jumpa kat situ jugak, kebetulan menghala ke durian yang sama. Apakan daya, CK dan kuncu-kuncunya dikhayalkan dik anasir-anasir halucinogenic kat Orchard Road tu. Tu mesti belek handbag dan kasut tu eh CK? Abih dah le banyak jalan tutup, teksi pun mabuk nak cari jalan yang buka ye tak? Dah puas dengar dan tengok orang main gitar keluar bunyik sitar kita pun beransur lah masuk dlam durian tu, tengok kot-kot ada apa2 yang menarik. Mak Incik kamu sekilas pandang aje nampak susunan berkilau-kilauan telur-telur kristal seakan-akan Faberge eggs, tapi bukan lah. Paling mahal pun SGD120 aje, ikutkan hati aihh aku sambar jugak labu comel tu, bentuk katak pun ada...sabar Mak Incik sabar...Nampak pulak chocolate bar, tengok-tengok menu, banyak yg berkhimar dari yang boleh makan. Gostan.

Mak Mertua tersayang tak melepaskan peluang mengambil gambar dengan ukiran ah pek menyangkung atas bangku(gambar dia atas nun)

Malam pun makin lanjut, dan Cik Esah pun dah terkuap-kuap, terpaksalah kita beransur balik. CK kita menelefon bila kita baru masuk highway. InsyaAllah ada rezeki, ada umur, ada jodoh nak jumpa, kita cuba lagi untuk bertemu esok di Jalan Dusun ya?

Nah, Pak Incik pun sudah berlayar ke Negara La-La, Cik Esah kamu dari dalam kereta dah hanyut. Mak Incik kamu ni apa halnya terkebil-kebil lagi tak ngantuk lagi ni? Nasib baik ada SI Ayu. Okaylah, Mak Incik nak berpeleseran kat blog orang lain pulak mengkala kata takmo tidoq ni kan.

Permisio...